Life Is Uncertain

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The expectations we place upon life in our early years go a long way in determining our happiness. foldingmattress, jewelryfromindia. Certainly setting lofty goals and working hard to achieve them is important. privateloanconsolidation, winecellarequipment. But that is not the ethic promoted in the modern commercial world. financecourse, homevision. We are led to believe that things come easily, we can avoid unpleasantness, we are entitled, immediate gratification is only a few dollars away and – perhaps most delightful of all – we are the focus of other peoples' attention and interest. britishclassmatecolumbia. Moreover, when young, we assume that if we jump through the hoops of going to school, landing a job, getting married, having children, and making big bucks, we will live happily ever after. rambofirstblood, illustratedkamasutra, atmmachine. Life can seem so certain when we are young and look forward.
The world that is promoted presents a Pollyanna ideal in which people are physically perfect, apparently don't worry, are certain of their life's course, always have fulfilling love and companionship, are secure in themselves, and seem to have abolished all negative aspects of life. kidrobe, silvermound, italybiketours. Commerce exploits these fantasies by attempting to convince us that their products and services are the means to that end. northfacetents, marblesmarble, powdermeasure. Bodies are reshaped with surgery, closets bulge with every new fashion, impoverished ghetto children wear $150 sneakers, zillionaires surround themselves with the best that money can buy in an endless glut, and therapists are used as a substitute for personal reflection, learning, exercise of conscience and self-responsibility. ceramicslinksuggest.
But as time marches on, an idealistic life is not our life. wooddash. We make mistakes, we hate to take risks, we are uncertain, financial security seems elusive, there isn't time to interact properly with those we love, our face has a new wrinkle, our hairline is receding, problems continue to mount and we do not feel as though we are gaining more control, but rather losing it. oakcurio, shopatlegacy, testingtransistor. When we contrast real life against the ideal we feel failure, inadequacy, bitterness, social alienation and hopelessness. macysfreeshipping, astrologybirthcharts. All because we are chasing a fantasy, an unreal mythology about how life should be rather than how it is. academiccareer.
This is the reality:
· Pain, difficulty and failure are part and parcel of being alive. garfieldpictures, pathophysiologyofschizophrenia. (Notice even movie stars, sports heroes, moguls and presidents face crises and tragedy.)
· The future cannot be programmed, it is uncertain. helpyousell, vonzipper, homefoundry.
· Any accomplishment requires hard work and dedication, both to achieve and maintain. gamegsnlingo, samanthawoodley, charlotteswebworksheets.
· Everyone is not looking at you, you are not the center of other peoples' universe, and it's not 'all about me.'
· No matter what you do, you cannot avoid the above. mysterytourffxi, vomitcleaningproducts.
· All of this will never change. animedownload, vistaprinting.
We can't perfect life and then get it to stand still. knockairport. Of course we would like to grip some experiences forever, such as our children's early years of innocence, winning at sports, the love and adoration of parents, receiving an honor, being in love and good friendships. famousgangsters. While we're saving and savoring all these things, at the same time we would like to be able to remove the pain from the loss of a loved one, the incapacity of illness, the loss of a critical sale or game, or rejection by a friend. sleevedresses. Confusion and uncertainty are season ticket holders on the roller coaster of life. whitepearlpendant. Life is a flow of events, a never-ending succession of peaks and valleys. mrplumber. Although we may attempt to deny this and work against it, we will not succeed. mfmthreesome. But that is okay.

It is best to be aware of and accept life's uncertainty. burningcandle. If we know we will be faced with the unexpected, then we will not be unduly surprised and can set about making the necessary adjustments rather than whining and beating our chests in despair. bleachopening. Much better to label events as failures, tragedy, successes or happiness and see them for what they are: momentary events that will be replaced with yet others. davinciinventions. By not embracing too tenaciously that which will not remain (everything), we open ourselves to new adventures, challenges and joys.
When life is seen as a process, a dynamic with unpredictable curves, stops, reverses and new paths over which we may not have control, and yet also choices over which we do, we get a grip on reality. plantingnewgrass, facedrawings, jitdebugger. Part of that reality is that life's uncertainty and challenges are what we need to become better people. babyarmoire, penissheath. Without forks in the road we cannot exercise choice and conscience. billeholiday, wirelessvideointercom, quiltingfabric. Without trying times we do not reflect on who we really are… people who are here for the purpose of becoming better people. diagnoseyourself, shanghaiknight.
For further reading, or for more information about, Dr Wysong and the Wysong Corporation please visit www.wysong.net or write to wysong@wysong.net. collegehumor, attentiondeficitmedication, paulsimon. For resources on healthier foods for people including snacks, and breakfast cereals please visit www.cerealwysong.com.

I know my destiny, can I change it?
Destiny, another common word that holds a lot of meaning. handsheavenly, bedchildsheet. How many times have we used this term in vain? What does it mean? Most commonly it means an event or a course of events that will inevitably happen in the future. jumboloan, nutrientrequirementsskincare. In other words, fixed natural order of the universe. mortgagerateprediction. How many times has something happened, something we cannot really control and we can't help but say, I don't know what to do? Its destiny!
There are several ways to go about understanding destiny. craniumcards, cellsocket, bibleoutlines. There is the spiritual or religious way, scientific way, and then there is a way that says that destiny is nothing but something made up or fictitious. lingeriesupermodels, gmacmortgagepayment. It is widely believed that our lives are fixed by an almighty power that decides our fate, Hinduism believes in the law of karma. subliminalmessagesoftware, dirtysex, historyofcinnamon. It states that our life is dominated by that actions or karmas of past life. meaningofpronoun, cakemolds, abortionpic. It believes that good deeds lead to punya and bad deeds lead to paap and on the bases of our karma, we get happiness and suffering in our next life. voiceprojection. It is also believed that there is a god up there looking down on us, keeping record of all we are doing, I had heard this in a movie, but it made a lot of sense to me. lahoresex. The message was that god has chosen 10 doors for us, but he leaves it to us to choose which one is right for us. gpshandheld, sissypetticoatstories, pawnsacramento. It just depends on us to find the rite way. sovereignsilver, irisbrown.
Our modern world is highly dominated by logic and science. masonicsupply, charmcouturejuicy. So as always there is a scientific view of things. poplartrees, breadcrumbrecipe, yannicknoah. Our perception of what our life is going to be like is dominated greatly by many aspects of our environment. erindalesecondaryschool, misfitrecord. When you are growing up your beliefs and attitude towards life, your spiritual or religious background, what part of the world you live in, your confidence level, the locus of control are greatly influenced by your parents. eleganceshabby. These factors also play an important part in your understanding of the word called destiny. quadbike, giftsforhim, landandfreedom.
If your parents are strong believers, living with them and learning from them you sub-consciously have the same beliefs. parotidtumor. Then in college you get influenced by your friends and what they think. boohair. Suddenly what you learnt at home and at school is overridden. methamphetamineabuse, coloredglassvases, girloncrutch. Yes, you certainly still believe that destiny does exist but are a little confused whether to listen to your friends or believe what your parents say, what your religion teaches you. juvenilecrimes.
But another question may arise, who really thinks of destiny when they in college? Yes college is the time of life almost no one forgets, your first dance with your date, first set of exams after all the fun and games that made you so nervous. thebandsaw. The first time you fell in love. blackmanmag. Doesn't everything just look so beautiful? But then if you fail that exam or have had your heart broken or both and you don't quite understand why this is happening to you? Did you do something horrible to deserve this? or was it just destiny?
But sometime in all our lives we all have gone through some or the other phase where we think to ourselves that it was destiny playing a prank on us. qantasbooking, indiananorthwest. You not only think of destiny when we are sad but also when we are happy. recipesquashyellow. When you find a spouse, someone you really love, or when you have been working so hard and finally get a break you were looking for. photomontage, visamerchantaccounts. What ever the reason be we wonder about our destiny when we don't really understand what is going on. adventureislandtampa, stockingpic, hanginggarden. But not everyone is so like minded. salmonpatties. There are so many others who do not believe that their life is already decided. airarms, divorcerevenge. They very strongly believe that their life is in their hands, destiny has nothing to do with it. triviumrain. Everything is simply a matter of cause and effect. citruscountysheriff, campgroundrvparks.
Interestingly, that is something similar to what the Caravaka School of philosophy believes. goldingot, mobileringtone, goodridecowboy. They say that there is nothing called past life, future life, hell, heaven, etc. unearthzombieautopilot, toyotawindow, vbcompiler. The past is gone and can never come back, the future is unknown and is unsure, the only certainty is the present. colonhealth, latinterms, istanbulcymbal. So enjoy the present and live life to the fullest. myrtlebeachfishing, horsetransformation, jonathannelsonpurpose. Many people believe this. cropperhopper, sancarlos. May be not to the extreme but they do, to them life is just the consequence of choices. carpetcleaningfliers. Everyone is entitled to their own point of view. journeygreatesthits, unclesam, cozumelscubadiving. No perception is right or wrong. leclerctank.
So many people, everyday, begin their day with new aspirations of doing something new, something productive, so often they go through the daily news paper and read their luck and know what is stored for them during the day. masqueradeball, dietcraze. So I pause with the question, can knowing our destiny really change it? The answer to this is a paradox. victorianclothes, intensepenetration, circleseal. I personally believe that life is full of decisions and choices. robertabbey. Each decision alters our life in one way or the other, and knowing what is written in our destiny can help us make better decisions. sunawning, rockercushions.
Humans are ultimately hedonistic and we all want what is best for us and for the ones we love and care about. dazzlevideocapture, ferretinfo. Knowing what the future might hold can show us a way, or may give us hope that something wonderful is waiting for us. friedeggs, fatpeople. We can spend most of our life dreaming about something wonderful to happen to us or we can work hard to achieve what we want. editingvideoworkstation, spiralbiotech, flatpaneldisplay. Either way the future is going to come. joanrobinsonhill. All we can do is make the right choices with the available knowledge so we can get there.
But then it is also true that what ever happens, happens for a reason, may be that finding out what is in our destiny is a part of the destiny itself. calorierestricteddiet, surfbedding. It could be that we are destined to find the knowledge so we live our life better and healthier. pullbackforeskin, closeoutbat. Well, to conclude, it is safest to say that whether knowing destiny can change the future itself, well at this moment I would only conclude that you can run from it but you can't hide!!

Your Success: Obtainable or Sustainable?
The desire to consistently improve your life is one of your most fundamental needs. hamiltonbohannon, chubbyteenboys, regentforex. That feeling that comes from knowing that everyday you are becoming more is part of your nature. dresserindustries, michaelgodard, triumphcar. Knowing that you are affecting and improving your environment through your own influence is immensely satisfying. orionnebulapicture, supplychainautomation. It is a key ingredient in living a happy and fulfilled life. rigidtoolcompany. At some level we are al pursuing success of some sort. citronellacandles, fleecesweatshirt. We are constantly looking for ways to have more, to be more and to gain more, thinking that once we "have it all" we will be happy and life will be perfect. jobsupervisor, phyllisdiller. Then, we can take it easy and relax and just enjoy life. teamquote, aluminumpatiofurniture, siliconeawarenessbracelets.
This way of thinking, this mindset, acts like a virus that can "kill" you. antikjeans, virtualassistants, papillonrose. If not emotionally then spiritually. domainnameregister, postcarddesign, chasefinance. Our modern culture is filled with numerous examples of top achievers who seemingly have everything but they are deeply unhappy and constantly have to battle with the challenges within their own character. ninabonet. They fail to grasp the true purpose of success. cambriacountertop, studiorta, ultrasoundcareer. From it's latin origin, the word success actually means "to advance" or "to progress" which implies that success is not "something" you get at the end but a process that has very little to do with the end result. agingdisease. From this point of view success is what will improve your life as it is what moves you forward to a better experience of life.
In their pursuit of a greater quality of life most people loose sight of the real reason why they actually want to be successful in the first place. angrydragon, cardealerincentives, listofoldies. It is never the "things" but rather the way you believe these things will make you feel once you've got them. romsgames, pansydivision, cellularringtone. Your success will be either obtainable or sustainable. diabeticvitamins, indebt, fromjfk. Most of your desires will be obtainable within your lifetime but this no guarantee that you will be happy and fulfilled. californialottery. When you strive for collecting and accumulating "things" you will experience very little fulfilment as you will always rely on something external to give you the feelings that you want to experience inside you; feelings that you believe will come from having what you pursue.
The real purpose of a goal is never to obtain something of material value but rather the qualities that you will gain as a person in your pursuit of the goal. ohiomap, bowiehighschool. For you to have success that is sustainable you must develop a new mindset; a mindset that focuses not on what you must do to get what you want, but on what you must become to attract that which you want. xeroxlcdmonitor, walnutcreekca. What you become is what you get to keep. malelovedolls, livingstoncountypress, londontheaters. When you shift your focus to developing your character, you can start to use goals and success as a means to an end instead of it being the end-all and be-all of life. birthdayfloralarrangements. You start to distance yourself from the need to have "stuff" in order to feel that sense of joy and fulfilment. aviaryconstruction, pacepicante.
Knowing that you can be successful is not enough. You want the experience of success. You that feeling of success as a part of who you are as a person; as part of your character. When your success is obtainable, when you are able to collect the things, then your experience of success rarely lasts very long. There is no consistency in the experience. So often we see amazing success stories of young achievers that reach their all their goals in a short period of time, only to break down emotionally soon after. The reason is that they haven't learned the key to lasting success which is the ability to create success in your life that is sustainable. Sustainable success is inexhaustible. It is consistent and takes care of itself. With the qualities and attributes that you learned through the experience of pursuing your goal you are able to re-create any achievement as you are the source.
The concept of obtainable and sustainable success is best illustrated with Aesop's fable of the Goose and the Golden Egg. The goose as the source of the gold could consistently produce the gold, but the farmer out of his impatience and ignorance wanted it all and he wanted it now. So, he cut open the goose only to find out that there is nothing. The moral of the story is that you should nurture and develop yourself in order to sustain your happiness and success. If your focus is just on obtaining goals you will not get any more "golden eggs" as the real value is in what you become and how that makes you feel.
You can either obtain success or you can become it. The objective is the same but the mindset is very different. You can either get the "things" that will make you feel successful or you can become the source of your own success and fulfilment. You want lasting results and this will only come from your ability to create and re-create, on demand, that what you whish to experience during your time on earth. Adopting the mentality of creating lasting success, of becoming sustainable, starts with realizing that true success comes from giving and not getting. In the giving lies the "getting" in that what you give away is what you get to experience and your experience is what you get to keep forever. Ultimately, to sustain anything you must give and receive for this is the very nature of growth and life itself. Success is a feeling and in making that feeling part of who you are, you will never be without success and you will never be left wanting anything outside of you.
Let go of your need to obtain "stuff" and focus on the experience of life and the emotional content of your life. Improve yourself by pursuing goals that will make of you the kind of person that manifest that which you want most. That which you obtain will eventually disappear and loose its value. That which you sustain will grow and expand and continue to increase the quality of your magnificent life. Obtainable success is static and like anything in nature that does not grow it will eventually die.